Re: Great lines from Ira

I'll go to my grave arguing for the artistic merits of the Strokes and Room on Fire (yeah, I know, you think they suck, thanks for sharing), but Ira unloads a line in his review that's been making me smile for several days now, saying the album contains "brisk missives from the glamorous VIP lounge of urban ennui". Anybody got any other lines from the guides or website they particularly like?



Post Edited (05-03-05 16:21)

I really like John Leland's opening paragraph to the Swans review. (At least I assume it's Leland's; he's the first reviewer in the credits for that one.)

that is indeed John's. And a great description it is.

Any entry that uses the word 'semiotics' is hilarious.

I always thought the Marilyn Manson entry was hilarious. I love the line about the Alice Cooper olive dropped into a vat-sized White Zombie cocktail.

Brad Reno's take on R.E.M.'s fall from grace is downright scary in its plain-spoken accuracy and eloquence:

"Reveal is not bad—in fact, it’s pretty good, containing such strong tracks as the single “Imitation of Life” and “Summer Turns to High”—but its release felt like a non-event, just another album from a band that was no longer a guiding force in music. U2, the only other major band that could be considered their peers in having carried the ’80s college rock banner into the ’90s alternative era, found themselves in the same position following Pop—elder statesmen, respected and admired, but reluctantly conceded to be becoming irrelevant—but through sheer force of will refused to let themselves be written off and remained a vital force still able to combine critical and commercial success. Whether R.E.M. will be able to pull off that same trick remains to be seen."

Reno is a top-notch writer, all around. I really have enjoyed the recent entries/updates from him -- U2, R.E.M., Ultravox, John Foxx, et al.

Bill Wyman's review of Lyle Lovett's work is great too, especially the opening paragraph.

and who can forget Ira's classic Perry Ferrell/Michael Bolton comparison?
How about the hilarious analogy about over zealous drummers and waiters at a snooty restaraunt?
Anything in the past about KISS.
Anything in the future about "ROCK STAR INXS"

Everyone hates a kiss ass. So I set out to set the record straight. I put on the RIDE- Tarantula cd today and thought I'd found the missing link to dethrone #47 STONE ROSES album. I was certain that this was where I'd dent the wizards top 50 smorgasboard. Nevermind (Here's to TP's FIFTH EDITION!) the fact that it came out in'88 versus the STONED's '87 for a moment. TARANTULA is an an udder masterpiece! Nary a dull moment throughout the program. Casual and confident. Catchy and cool...Hotdamn.
After that...
I played GAY DAD and tried to squeeze that very same TARANTULA album in between 'em...I subsequently concluded the experiment a failure. Ira's Top 50, (from 45-50 anyway) remains intact.

set out to set????

was it Ira who called PIL's first album "an unremitting piece of ****" in TP?

'fraid it was.

well, it does fit for some of it... about half of it is great, though.

honestly, i don't think i was ready for it. i would not say that about the album now.

I used to think Jim Green's original review of the Gary Wilson album "You Think You Really Know Me" was the funniest thing ever.

The entire Sting review.

I'm a little late to this thread, but for my money, the single most draw-jopping has always been (from the 2nd guide, not in 1st or 4th, don't know about 3rd [and how pathetic is that in itself, anyway?]) the entry "JAMES BROWN-See Afrika Bambaataa"...

For my money, I'll take those entries where Ira uses a gas-based metaphor as the underying conceit. E.g., Negativland, Nirvana.

I really like Ira's line in the opening paragraph of the Hootie & the Blowfish review: "As familiar as the face in a mirror ... [and] just about as deep."

(Gas-based metaphor?)

Hunh?

Ahhhh, yes. I should've re-read those two reviews, at least, before I questioned the pimp's comment ... dumb yokel that I am ...

Ah shucks, look at his 5th Ed WEEZER entry for a gas. "A deliciously entertaining piece of crap." Thanks for the overview on the 90's man. Its a good thing bands like the Goo Goo Dolls and Soul Asylum were around. Otherwise, it would be all SMOG, DINO Jr. and SONIC YOUTH...bartender...just one more please.



Post Edited (06-25-05 01:17)

"It sounds like Thin Lizzy meets Graham Parker with a rocket up his ass. Narsty." - Jim Green on Steve Swindells (of Hawkwind)'s FRESH BLOOD

I've never heard the album, but that description has always made me want to.

way da go breeeno!
Just the other day I came across an old Jim Green insert in a BINKY PHILLIPS album ('87 on Caroline records...find it!) Green is cool. Last I heard, he was on 90210 with Jason Priestly. Yes, Jim Green the great TP writer right? (not to be confused w/ Brian Austin Green the since forgotten t-ball level act-tore w/ a profound nasal delivery that came across to viewers as a speech impediment.)
Whether he knows it or not, but Jim Green is responsible for at least 150 records in my stash.
ALLO JIM!!