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Author: Delvin
Date: 06-06-12 12:11
I can think of about 90 things to say about this, just off the top of my head, but the target is such an easy one that it wouldn't be any fun for me.
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Author: erikalbany
Date: 06-06-12 12:22
Taylor Swift: "There are things that were little nuances of the relationship, little hints."
Yeah, like the subtlety of calling the song "Dear John" after a highly publicized relationship with John Mayer.
What a douchette. Thank you for not reproducing together.
I always preferred Jonathan to Taylor Swift, anyway.
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Author: breno
Date: 06-06-12 13:33
I'm mainly just amused that a thirty-something year old man would be shocked and hurt that dating a teenager led to her getting all huffy at him. Did Fiona Apple's entire career somehow sneak past him?
God, there's a frightening thought, if Mayer and Apple ever hooked up. I could see that triggering the Mayan apocalypse. The combined self-absorption would achieve the mass of a black hole and suck the planet into it.
Post Edited (06-06-12 13:44)
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Author: Delvin
Date: 06-06-12 14:44
As if the crappy music that would result from their collaboration wouldn't be punishment enough.
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Author: nosepail
Date: 06-06-12 19:58
I think Taylor Swift's last CD was fabulous. John Mayer is the douche in that story, not Taylor.
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Author: breno
Date: 06-06-12 20:55
John Mayer is the douche in every story. Even stories he doesn't actually appear in, for his douche-itude is so vast that it refuses to be contained by his mere physical presence.
Why did Billie Joe McAllister jump off the Tallahatchee Bridge? 'Cuz John Mayer's a douche.
Who killed Bambi? That douche John Mayer.
Who knocked on Coleridge's door and made him lose his train of thought while writing Kubla Khan? That was John Mayer, bein' a douche.
Why are Johnny, Joey and Dee Dee dead? The universe just couldn't bring itself to force them to live on the same planet as a douche like John Mayer.
Will the circle be unbroken? No, John Meyer is going to come along and break it just cuz he's a douche.
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Author: rebelwithoutaclue
Date: 06-06-12 21:01
imagine if they produced a kid together. hopefully the kid would have musical talent but would also rebel against the music of john mayers blandness.
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Author: HollowbodyKay
Date: 06-07-12 10:34
Quote:
Why did Billie Joe McAllister jump off the Tallahatchee Bridge? 'Cuz John Mayer's a douche.
Who killed Bambi? That douche John Mayer.
Who knocked on Coleridge's door and made him lose his train of thought while writing Kubla Khan? That was John Mayer, bein' a douche.
Why are Johnny, Joey and Dee Dee dead? The universe just couldn't bring itself to force them to live on the same planet as a douche like John Mayer.
Will the circle be unbroken? No, John Meyer is going to come along and break it just cuz he's a douche.
Err ... what makes the muskrat guard his musk?
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Author: Delvin
Date: 06-07-12 11:19
So when it comes to awful things happening — musical or otherwise — there are no degrees of separation between the tragedy and John Mayer?
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Author: erikalbany
Date: 06-07-12 12:35
Now what is the message there? The message is that there are no "knowns." There are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say there are things that we now know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we do not know we don't know. So when we do the best we can and we pull all this information together, and we then say well that's basically what we see as the situation, that is really only the known knowns and the known unknowns. And each year, we discover a few more of those unknown unknowns.
It sounds like a riddle. It isn't a riddle. It is a very serious, important matter: John Mayer is a douche.
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Author: MrFab
Date: 06-07-12 12:56
Ha! This gets the coveted 'Standells-On-Munsters' Thread Of The Year award.
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Author: M. Johnson
Date: 06-07-12 16:49
D.O.D.A.D.
Department of Defense Against Douches.
I bet the SecDef loves John Mayer. " 'Waiting On The World To Change' is soo deep and soulful."
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